Learning Group Tutorial Feedback

In the tutorial, I presented 3 double paged spreads that were printed just a bit smaller than the actual size and were in black and white; I also showed the digital copy on my laptop so they could see it in colour. Overall, the feedback was positive, they liked the images I used and the way I approached the article. They offered some really good feedback in how I can improve it. They like the illustrative typography and they said it’s something I should continue with throughout the article. For the front cover they said I should use illustrative type but change the title of the from ‘Transgender Surgery at 16’ because they said it seemed too obvious and didn’t match the playfulness that I was going for within the article. I mentioned a quote where the boy in the article describes himself and they said to use that as the title because then it will make it less obvious what the article is about and make it a more interesting cover. Another thing they said was they liked the images in black and white and said to try using black and white images with orange text on top – also to play around with the transparency of the images. One last thing they said to improve was the body text; the paragraphs were too close together and there are a few problems with rag and orphans so I need to spend a lot of time breaking that up.

Improvements:

Front cover

BEFORE IMPROVEMENTS:

Screen Shot 2017-05-24 at 12.04.30.png

The first thing I did was create an illustration for the front cover. I took the title from the quote: “I identify as a transman, a faggy queen, a homosexual, a queer, a nerdfighter, a writer, an artist, and a guy who needs a haircut.” I think that using “I identify as a transman, a faggy queen and a guy who needs a haircut” as the front cover, is a really quirky start to an article and feel like because it’s quite humorous, it’s inviting to open and read the article. I completed the same process as what I did for the ‘Genderbread Person’ illustration; drew it out by hand, scanned it in and then added it onto the article. One thing I needed to do first was change the colour of the image, so I went onto Photoshop and converted it to black and white. Placing this back onto the article along with the illustrative typography, began to already create a stronger looking front cover. I tried using orange for the typography like suggested in the tutorial but I much preferred it in white so instead I put orange lines on the page (like I had on other pages in the article) and then in the corner I wrote the heading, sub-heading and author of the article in orange.

AFTER IMPROVEMENTS:

Below is the current look of the front cover. I’m really happy with the improvements that the group suggested because it looks so much stronger than the original front cover I presented them with.

Screen Shot 2017-05-07 at 21.02.03.png

First double page spread

BEFORE IMPROVEMENTS:

Screen Shot 2017-05-24 at 12.04.41.png

With this spread, I started out by changing the colour of the photo to black and white and then spent some time breaking up the paragraphs so that it wasn’t such a big chunk of text. One thing said in the tutorial was I shouldn’t have any white space in the article and that I should increase the size of all images to fill the pages. Once doing this I then picked out a quote from the text and drew it out. I chose “I’ve finally reached a point where my transition is not consuming my life” because since this is the first page of the article with text on it, I wanted there to be a good opening quote to show the start of a conversation. After choosing to use white for the front cover’s quote, I wanted to use orange for this one. I spent a lot of time with the composition of the quote on the page because I found that though orange is a bright cover on top of a black and white background, you were losing it among the photograph. I did eventually come to a point that I was happy with how the typography sat on the page.

20170523_153338.jpg

AFTER IMPROVEMENTS:

The image in black and white and orange text works so much better than the original. Having the paragraphs of text broken up also looks so much better because it sets a better pace to the article.

Screen Shot 2017-05-24 at 12.15.26.png

Second double paged spread

BEFORE IMPROVEMENTS:

Screen Shot 2017-05-23 at 17.25.03.png

I actually really liked this page with the image in colour and the writing in white but I understood what they meant by changing it to have the image spanning the whole page because the composition of it wasn’t quite right. The photograph I used originally is portrait so I wasn’t able to enlarge it to fill the whole page so I used the photo that I had on the final page because of it being landscape. I changed the image to black and white and had it spread out in full on the spread. The good thing about the image I was now using was that there was plenty of blank space around it which meant I had plenty of room to place the body text. I broke up the text by having a space between each paragraph and correcting the rag and orphans. I was able to have the illustrative type in the colour orange and worked really well stood on top of the image I had now chosen to use because they are both quite quirky pieces of imagery.

AFTER IMPROVEMENTS:

I like the combination of this image and typography; I feel that it’s a lot more contextualised and is a more interesting piece of work to look at.

Screen Shot 2017-05-24 at 12.15.32.png

Final page

BEFORE IMPROVEMENTS:

Screen Shot 2017-05-24 at 12.04.55.png

This page, I had spend the least amount of work on so it was looking really dull and uninteresting compared to the other pages. The first thing I needed to do was change the image; I used the one I had originally chosen for the 2nd double page spread. After making it black and white, I had it cover the whole page, keeping the orange line running through and the body text to the left hand side. In the tutorial they had suggested I should do an illustrative quote on this page as well but I felt that because it was the final page at the back it didn’t need as much detail as the other pages.

AFTER IMPROVEMENTS:

There’s a huge improvement in look on this page just by changing a few things. I am unsure whether it needs anything else or to just leave it as it is so in the next tutorial I will ask what else I should do with it.

Screen Shot 2017-05-24 at 12.15.39.png

Print out

After making the changes, I printed out the article to see what it was like in actual size. I did not print in it the actual size it was, I shrunk it slightly to save paper but after printing it and seeing how big it is, I’m happy with the size it is and would not want it any bigger so I will change the size of the article on InDesign so I work on the actual size I want it to be printed in.

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Author: ellenreiddesign

First year Graphic Communication student at Cardiff Metropolitan University.

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